On the 16th of this month, it was the 8th anniversary of this dA account. It's been through 3 names: Morbiddreams13, RxKQueen, & now Batty-Brandyn. Looking back on my old stuff, I cringe. Looking at my new stuff, I still cringe but not as much when I compare it to how my "art" used to look. It's surreal... it doesn't feel like 8 years. So much has changed... not just my art. My views on my life, finding out who I truly was, finding out who my true friends were... I could go on.
It's funny... I originally made this dA so I can see when my then-gf submitted art - which I adored. I loved when she would draw me things because my art was shit but I attempted to do it anyway. Then fast forward to 2010, I started to take art a bit more seriously to impress/get the attention of my ex... I even lost weight (the unhealthy way) to do that as well - it worked in August 2013 & it made me want to draw better so I can make more impressive pieces. I turned into that gf... drawing things for somebody who didn't have artistic ability - it went in full circle. But I didn't mind doing it... because I loved him & I knew at the time, it made him happy. Then, the break up happened in December & I found out a few things that burned on my mind - which were confirmed a couple months ago...so the next 2 deviations I'm going to upload sometime in the next week or two are gonna be about how my work/life after the break up transitioned... and how I realized this: I draw & do things for ME - as it should be. Drawing became a stress reliever, an escape from my problems temporarily, a release of the tensions due to anxiety, & most importantly: it made me forget... I was set free from the chains of grief, heartbreak, & feeling like I was trash thrown to the side of the road. Those two comics will also be the last time my ex will ever be mentioned or seen on this dA page. Last week, I deleted 98% of the deviations of the 'lovey dovey' deviations of us two together - I don't need them anymore & I don't have the work backed up... so it's forever lost in the depths of cyber space. I'll only hold on to the good times we've shared... in my memories where they belong... not for all to see - especially since the relationship doesn't/will not exist again. So finally, I'm moving onto bigger & BETTER things in my life. Much love to you all & I hope y'all are excited to see more work from me! Have huge ideas.